This is all she wants
by em-iloveyou-d
Summary: She doesn't like that he doesn't say anything when she opens the box for him and shows him they tiny kitten inside. Hill/Coulson
1. This is all she wants

She doesn't like that he doesn't say anything when she opens the box for him and shows him they tiny kitten inside. Or that his face gets pale when she tells him the kitten is named Agent Phil Coulson II. Maybe it's the II he doesn't like; it implies there will be a III eventually. However, Hill is pretty sure it's the idea of the two of them being cat parents he doesn't like.

Which Hill doesn't understand at all.

You can't just sit in a dark room and wax poetically about how amazing it would be to just get out and start a family and live in a nice little three bedroom suburban ranch and little Captain America halloween costumes and hockey practice, and then comment how it will never happen because they are both in too deep. She's deputy director and he's the top agent. They can't just walk away from this.

But Fury will overlook a cat aboard the helicarrier. They can have a cat, and isn't that good enough? That can be their family. They can be the modern couple with a cat, although they aren't publicly a couple, but everyone pretty much already knows (but everyone is too busy fawning over Clint and Natasha or Bruce and Tony's new brotherhood or Thor's little brother and Thor's problems).

So when he ignores the cat the first couple of days, Hill is a little sad. Her bun isn't exactly tidy like always and when she rattles off reports to Fury, she seems to sigh at the end.

She's foolish for trying to hold onto these little girl dreams of a happy family. She has accomplished so much in her life motherhood shouldn't matter. And it really never did. But maybe she just wanted to mother specific children.

Either way, at the end of the day, Hill has a glum cloud following her around the base, and everyone steers clear of her because they all sense she's a ticking time bomb. She's been ripping people down all day for not getting things done fast enough or for wasting time playing games. She almost makes a nurse cry in the med bay. One too many interns get in her way and she's ready to just explode at Phi-Agent Coulson.

She storms into his room, not even knocking and so quickly, because she knows that passcode so well, it's tattooed on her eyelids right under her own. She opens her mouth to yell and scream and readies herself to break every single piece of his Captain America memorabilia, but instead she finds a very tuckered out Phil, probably stress from dealing with Stark and recovering from recent injuries, with the tiny kitten he shares a name with curled up on his chest.

Hill relaxes and locks the door behind her, and then steps out of her boots and carefully peels off her uniform and grabs a very patriotic tee shirt out of Phil's dresser before smoothly curling up on Phil's side. She scratches the kitten's chin, who purrs in response, and then snuggles into Phil's shoulder and drifts off.

This is all she wants.


	2. SHIELD Pajama Party

Once again, the dogs-boys-Avengers, have set off the fire alarm in the wee hours of the morning. As the alarms blare, Hill and Coulson are on their feet yelling orders, landing the helicarrier in the ocean, readying lifeboats, anything but who knows what's going to happen this time. Has the Hulk been awakened? Is there acid in Rogger's eyes? Has Thor eaten multiple tray of pot brownies again and has summoned lightning to just show off? As they lead the last grunt onto the deck, Hill turns to Coulson and smirks. "Ten bucks this time it was Stark's fault."

Coulson laughs dryly and rolls his eyes. "It's always Stark's fault. This is why we should just ban him from the helicarrier."

Hill allows herself a laugh and adjusts the starting to calm down kitten clinging to body. "We both know that will never happen. He'll just hack into the systems and cause problems. It's better to keep an eye on him here sometimes and let him play with his friends."

"I just wish they wouldn't behave like little children."

"You've watched every episode of Supernanny. If they behaved like children, we could handle them."

The two are laughing quietly to themselves and cooing to their shared kitten when they realize they have been on the deck for a solid ten minutes in their own little bubble with an audience. Every single member of SHIELD is watching them, and the two quickly realize why.

While everyone has slept in their uniforms or at least a pair of sweatpants and a tee shirt, Coulson is in nothing but a pair of boxers that resemble Captain America's shield and his shoes and Hill is wearing the tee shirt that matched the boxers and her boots. Agent is curled up on Hill's shoulder, and both Hill and Coulson's hair are messes.

Fury shakes and turns away, but the Avengers team is still watching, wide eyed. Both agents and their cat just stare back blankly, daring anyone to say anything, and it seems like no one will try, although Clint and Natasha are secretly laughing hysterically.

Hill and Coulson are almost in the clear when one person pipes up.

"You guys were having a pajama party and didn't invite me?"

The next day, Tony's bed reeks of cat urine, and Hill and Coulson treat Agent to a new squeaky mouse toy and cat treats.


	3. Agent's Mission

Both Hill and Coulson are sitting at computer stations typing up reports. Agent starts off in her lap, but the kitten soon starts trying to climb up the front of Hill's uniform, so he is handed off to Coulson. After a few minutes of getting his claws stuck in Coulson's tie, the kitten is moved to the top of Hill's head. As soon as Agent picks apart Hill's bun, he is set on the floor and has his belly rubbed, then is swiftly ignored.

Agent really dislikes this. He's so tiny and this helicarrier is so big and he's still afraid of other people's shoes. He just wants his mama to scratch his chin with her smooth fingernails and his daddy to rub his whole back with his big hands. Agent attempts climbing up both of his parents' legs before his little claws give out and he plops back in the floor. He mews a few times only to be shushed, and makes a decision. If his parents aren't going to pay attention to him, he's going on another adventure.

On his last adventure, he found a white and yellow fuzzy thing that squawked at him and tried to bite his eyes off, and then he found a very large boot and took a nap in it. Agent is hopeful to find that boot again.

He almost crawls out of the computer lab, trying to be stealthy. Once he is in the hall, he breaks into a sprint and looks for that boot. A couple of agents pass him by without noticing him, and one opens a door on Agent's left, but the room smells weird so Agent moves on. Eventually he picks up the smell of fruit and heads that way, right into the lab.

Agent stares up at the two big men and then proceeds to tangled himself in the smaller one's shoelaces. Perhaps this shoe knows where the boot is. This shoe might take him there if Agent is "persuasive" enough. After a few minutes of interrogation, Agent is finally noticed and picked up.

Agent uses his tiny claws to cling to the big man for dear life and growls because he hates being picked up like this. He prefers being cradled with two hands, not held up by his scruff. He sinks his claws into the man's hand harder, hoping he will let go or get the message. The other man comes over and holds Agent the way he likes, which calms Agent down. The two men begin talking over Agent, but Agent isn't paying attention. All this exploring and interrogation and defensive measures has tuckered him out and if this man is going to hold still long enough, Agent is taking nap.

When Agent wakes up, he's in someone's room. It isn't one of his parents' because it smells like stranger, but also familiar, and this room's decoration looks like his daddy's. Agent looks up and sees another big man, this time bigger too, hovering over him with a smile on his face. The red and blue man coos at Agent and rubs his tummy awkwardly, but Agent doesn't care. At least no one is holding him the wrong way or ignoring him.

The red and blue man picks up Agent and settles the tiny operative on his shoulder and walks to the kitchen. Agent knows this is the kitchen for sure. He's had many a bowl of milk and nibbles of tuna in here. Red and blue man sets Agent down on the table and half disappears into the shiny food box and Agent goes to check all the shiny tools on the table because mama never lets him up here.

As Agent loses himself in a one and one match with the round shiny stick, the biggest man walks into the room and rumbles. Immediately Agent tries to run off the table. Training and experience has taught Agent to assess and then attack and that's his plan. But biggest man grabs Agent with two fingers and hauls the kitten up far too high for his liking. Biggest man grins and puts Agent right back down before talking to red and blue man. Agent decides to hang back behind the large round thing and wait for a plan of action to come to him.

Right when Agent finally devises his plan of attack, a familiar face enters the room. It's redhead lady; he wants to call her auntie, but he's not sure how mama would feel about it. Anyways, redhead lady spots him immediately and Agent runs to her babbling his plan of attack because redhead lady will totally have his back in this fight. But redhead lady just smiles and picks up Agent the way he likes and carries him out of the rooms while biggest man and red and blue man follow her out rumbling loudly.

Sleeveless man, or uncle, Agent hasn't decided, sees them from across the hall and follows the group. Big man and bigger man see the crowd and follow too. Agent starts to get excited. Is he getting a medal of honor? Is he getting a higher rank like his parents? But then Agent recognizes the hallway. He's near the agent computer lab. Oh. Redhead lady is taking him back to his parents. He must be getting the medal tomorrow.

The group walks Agent into the computer lab, and his parents turn and catch sight of him and look shocked. Maybe wandering off hadn't been the best idea. He doesn't like their looks. But mama just grabs him from redhead lady and snaps something at the people. They all leave, red and blue man last with a wave, and Agent is alone with his parents. Mama rolls her eyes and daddy just pats him on the head, and then the two of him work on scratching him behind the ears and rubbing his tummy until Agent drifts off.

The next day, one eyed man carries Agent around all day. Agent likes this. One eyed man likes to sit down in a swivel chair and pet Agent, and when anyone enters the room, one eyed man turns dramatically and both he and Agent stare them down.

Only top agents get to spend this much time with the one eyed man. Agent is on top of the world.


	4. Happy Birthday, Maria

Only a few people know when Agent Hill's birthday is.

Director Fury knows, he makes it a point to know everything about Agent Hill.

The Avengers team knows, Stark hacked into the personnel files and looked up everyone's birthday so he could put it on some big calendar and then immediately forgot every single date, but the rest of the team still checks the birthday calendar.

An agent or two knows, simply from being next to her when someone on the Avengers team wishes her a happy birthday.

Agent knows, someone was rude enough to place a small handmade party hat on his head that morning.

And of course Coulson knows, he won't stop texting her about it while he's away on his mission.

_Did you like Agent's hat? He obviously didn't._

_Do you want me to pick up something special for dinner?_

_I will be back in time for dinner, so don't make any plans._

_I'm sorry the Assvengers gave you a present rigged to shoot confetti in your face. How hard did you kick their asses?_

_Are you letting Agent type your replies now? alsdjalfjoewfj2 is not a word._

_Mission's all done. I'll be back on the helicarrier in two hours. Wear something nice._

Hill looks up from her phone just in time to deliver the closing reports in the meeting. There is not a hint of excitement on her face, and if you asked anyone around her, they would comment that Hill was cranky as ever. When the meeting ends, Hill storms into her room and locks her door before a huge smile overtakes her face and she spends the next hour half getting ready and half giving Agent the attention he wants.

Three hours finally pass by, and Hill is far from the excited birthday girl. She's honestly ready to rip Phil a new one for pulling this stunt on her birthday. He's always punctual, unless he finds a civilian in danger, but even then, he's usually very quick about it and makes up for lost time.

At hour four she gets a text from him.

_In med bay. No major injuries. Your dinner is with me._

With Agent in her hands, Hill hurries into the med bay in her low heels and pretty dress. Halfway in the door she realizes Phil's room is full of well wishers. Hill straightens up and adjusts the kitten in her arms before calmly walking over to Coulson's bed with a huge frown on her face.

"_Agent Coulson_. It's good to see you're okay, even if you are late."

But she honestly is worried. He's got an arm in a sling and a bandage is wrapped around his forehead and a large bruise is forming under his eye. She wants to punch his other eye because she knows these injuries aren't from his mission. They're from him being a hero.

Hill puts Agent down on Coulson's lap and looks around the room with her deadliest glare. Fury doesn't even need to look at her to tell she's upset and wants the room cleared. He's already got half of them out the door before Hill can swivel her glare around the room.

Once she alone, she closes the blinds and goes to sit on the bed. Phil looks at her, small smile on his face, while his un-slinged hand is busy petting Agent.

"I already apologized for being late, but I want to say I'm sorry for ruining your birthday in person. I did get you the dinner I promised. It's in the chair over there."

Hill looks over and sees the large brown paper bag and sighs. Shaking her head, she leans over and grabs their dinners out and hands Phil a fork. They begin eating quietly, not saying a word until ten minutes later when Maria finally clears her throat.

"So, what exactly happened this time?"

"Would you believe that someone robbed the bank across the street and held everyone in the restaurant hostage?"

Later, both her Phils are sleeping off a full tummy when Maria find an envelope with her name on it at the bottom of the bag. She opens it up to find her birthday card, and written inside of it is a promise.

_Next year, we're both taking the day off and going somewhere nice. _

She's going to hold him to this.


	5. Whole Person

Fury is very aware of how Hill is pacing, checking monitors, and gripping onto keyboards until they snap. But if hey says anything or gives it any attention, he knows Hill will just explode in his face. She's so well trained to keep calm in he face of danger that when she's emotionally overwhelmed, he knows to just ignore it. Addressing the problem makes it worse. If he even tries to calm her down, he's afraid she'll fall apart so hard that no one can pick up the pieces.

When the war is finally over, she is relieved slightly. But then the team that Coulson worked so hard to assemble disbands not much later, Hill is pure rage. Fury has the room cleared, and as soon as the doors shut behind the last operative, Hill is picking up pieces of debris and hurling them across the room. She screams herself hoarse and destroys the command center. When she finally stops, her hands are bloodied and Fury swears he almost sees Hill let a tear fill her eye before she just sits on the ground and quietly looks at her hands.

He walks over to her from his spot near the door when he's sure she done and clears his throat.

"You managed to do a lot more damage in one minute that Loki's attack squad did during the whole raid."

"SHIELD has plenty of incidental and slush funds to cover this. All files are on three backup drives. If there was any room to destroy, this is it," she mumbles back.

He puts a hand on her shoulder and sighs when she flinches at his touch. "I'm sorry I made you go get Coulson's cards. I know how much that hurt you. But you're the only other operative who knew where they were stashed."

She nods in response, and Fury knows Hills agrees with his reasoning. If she had been in the same position, she would have done exactly what he had. She just wants those cards back. She wants Rogers to sign them and she wants to hold onto them.

This is what she is left with. Unsigned cards covered in blood. That's what happens when you work for SHIELD. Your life is constantly in danger, always teetering on the edge. She had just assumed that after all these years, they were just too strong to go out so easily. But he went down fighting, and she's just going to privately mourn and move on with her life.

Minutes have passed with Hill and Fury saying nothing and completely standing still before Fury ruins the silence and moves towards the door. "C'mon Hill, time to go check on the injured in the med bay."

She turn to look at him and her face is surprisingly calm, but oh so broken. "Nick, I can't," she whispers, and Fury smiles in response.

"Maria, you're going to want to come with me. Someone in ICU wants to see you."

She follows Fury down the hall, emotionless. It's probably one of her underlings who survived some major injuries and wants to see her grim face so they can remember their place. Hill isn't even sure she can glare right now. It's too much effort to try to be herself right now. It's easier to be no one.

She snaps out of her thoughts when Fury holds open the door for her. She walks in and freezes, but Fury walks in behind her and pushes her forward.

"I wanted to tell you sooner, but I just found out myself halfway into your... outburst."

Agent Phil Coulson is lying on a hospital bed, hooked up to so many machines, and a large bandage covers his abdomen, but he's alive and smiling, and Maria Hill becomes a whole person again.


	6. Swift Punishment

"Phil... Phil...? Phil. Phil! PHIL! PHIL!"

Agent Phil Coulson wakes up to his name being called several times, and not the way he enjoys. Maria is in his room, shaking his arm rather violently, when she is well aware that he needs eight hours of sleep and he's only on hour three. But Maria doesn't care. She shakes him harder and then Phil hears something he rarely hears. Desperation.

He's wide awake and has a strong hold on Maria, who is thrashing about and talking a mile a minute. She finally calms down and he starts to understand what she's saying.

"He's gone, Phil! He's four inches tall! He's dead! We'll never see him again! OUR CAT IS GONE FOREVER!"

Phil is calm and looks around the room, but he immediately sees Maria has already torn it apart looking for Agent. Maria is hopping up and down putting on her boots and babbling hysterically, so Phil grabs a shirt and pulls it over his head and then puts on his slippers and follows Maria out the door as she makes clicking noises and calls out the full name of their cat. He has a pair of Canadian flag pajama pants in his hand for when she finally slows down and realizes she's about to have a repeat of the time she showed up in nothing but his tee shirt.

But Maria is hellbent on finding her kitten.

After searching every room that Maria and Phil take Agent in, Maria heads back to agent quarters and begins furiously knocking on doors.

"DO YOU HAVE MY CAT?"

"WHERE IS MY CAT?"

"WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?"

"IF YOU DO NOT HAND OVER MY CAT RIGHT NOW I WILL USE ALL MY RESOURCES TO MAKE SURE NO ONE EVER FINDS YOUR BODY."

But none of the SHIELD agents have seen Agent, half of them had no idea Agent even existed and the other half is too busy looking at Agent Hill in a tee shirt and boots again with Agent Coulson behind her shaking his head and holding her pants. Romanoff and Barton stare at her from the other end of the hall and walk away. They are not getting in the middle of this.

Hands balled into fists, Maria storms to the Avengers quarters, eyes blazing and a scowl so terrifying the interns on duty have all fled. She doesn't even enter the passcode, she punches the keypad into the wall and the door flies open.

Inside is just what she had expected and feared. Stark is measuring for an Iron Kitty suit, ("Iron Pussy!" he interjects, then snickers.) while Banner is working on schematics for it, and Thor and Rogers are petting Agent the wrong way and trying to force a small necktie and Captain America doll costume on the poor kitten.

Everyone whips around to stare at Agent Hill, who is now breathing heavily and turning red. Her hand is bleeding and dripping on the floor and her hair is is a very messy ponytail, and she looks like a serial killer in those boots.

Coulson slips in behind her, and then weaves in front of her and holds out his hands. "Give us the cat and no one gets hurt."

Everyone stares wide eyed, and Agent is already running straight for his parents. Coulson picks him up and backs away, and walks up to Hill. Hill's eyes are burning until Coulson takes the tie off of Agent, and she scowls until Coulson gives up trying to keep the Captain America costume on the kitten. Agent mews loudly, and Hill sighs and and runs his chin with her good hand. "I'm glad you're safe," she whispers and then looks up at Phil, relieved.

"AWWWWWW!"

Hill spins around, flames back in her eyes and cracks her knuckles on both her hands before grabbing a nearby chair and hurling it at the wall behind the four.

Coulson takes the overwhelmed kitten back to his room and grabs a first aid kit on the way. He waits up for her. She won't be long.

The next day, the Avengers team sits for their daily SHIELD meeting. Hill's hand is wrapped in a bandage and there's a proud smirk on her face. Coulson, beside her, looks amused, and four of the Avengers across the table look exhausted and slightly terrified for super heroes. Romanoff and Barton look ready to burst, and Fury is just confused, but goes on with the meeting anyways.

First subject on the agenda? Breaking and entering will not be tolerated and swiftly punished.


	7. Date Night

Date night is ruined once again, but this time not by a mission and not by the Avengers and not by a robbery.

They've ruined it themselves.

They walk a foot apart and steal glances when they think the other is not looking, but they're both frowning and their arms are crossed over their chests. They wait for the crosswalk light to change, and Phil turns to her, almost unsure, and Maria looks hopeful, but he can't find anything to say and she turns away disappointed. He sighs and awkwardly shuffles closer to her. Before the light changes, she nudges his hand with hers, and he threads his fingers in-between hers.

They make it across the street and Phil pulls her towards the park and leads her to a bench. They sit down, and she stares at him. "Are you okay? Is your chest bothering you?"

"I'm fine. I'm healing, not disabled."

"I just worry..."

"I'm fine."

"Just stop pushing yourself! You got stabbed-"

"I made a full recovery."

"And died! Your stitches are still fresh and we should have never-"

"We have been planning this night for a month!"

"Gone out tonight!"

The two realize they're still pushing each other on the issue and turn away from the other. They're so stubborn and they both know it, but neither one is going to give an inch and it hurts to be in a standoff.

"Phil... If you could just be more careful..."

"Maria, we're SHIELD agents. Our lives are always in danger. We can't just not be us."

"That's not what I mean and you know it."

"I am fine. I was released from the med bay and told to take it easy. This is easy."

"Easy is bed rest. Easy is somewhere where there aren't people. Easy is not in Central Park at night, Phil."

Maria knows she is nagging, but she can't stop. He just won't listen to her, and all she wants to do is keep him safe and hold onto him. And Phil won't stop because honestly if he slows down, he knows he's really going to feel this, how he almost died, and he wants to avoid it.

This is why SHIELD agents don't usually fraternize. Because it hurts when you lose each other. So many agents have defected or just gone off the map because of this. They should just end it now and leave each other, because Maria is pretty sure she can't physically handle hearing bad new from another doctor, and Phil has no idea what will happen if Maria is ever hurt.

"What do you want to do with the rest of our night out? Go home early?"

"Is it so wrong to want that?"

Phil sighs and leans back on the bench before putting his arm around her and pulling her close. Maria smiles to herself and relaxes against him. He kisses her forehead and she snuggles into his neck and they finally feel a little peace.

Half an hour passes and Phil nudges her awake. A sleeping Maria is adorable and he hates to ruin it, but she's right, he's still healing and he can't push himself, so carrying her is not an option. She stretches against him and then they use each other to get up, and begin planning their next destination. Phil has a credit card and a hotel is nearby. A little more alone time is just what they need.

But before they even register what is happening, Maria is pulled back by her neck. Phil turns just in time to see they've been cut off by two guys, and a third is holding a pitiful knife to Maria's neck. Phil can tell their muggers are confused as to why Maria isn't even putting up a fight, and Phil is just leaning on one leg and impatiently crossing his arms over his chest.

"Give us your wallet or your lady gets hurt!"

Phil sighs. "You honestly don't want to do that. Just let her go and walk away while you still can."

"Why old man? You gonna take us down?"

Maria rolls her eyes and huffs, and then elbows her captor in the gut. He lets her go, and Maria pulls her gun out of her boot and aims it at the man on her left. Phil already has his gun out and aimed at the other mugger.

"Walk away now, and no one gets shot," Maria growls.

The men run off like scared dogs, leaving Maria and Phil staring at each other, just a little adrenalin running through their veins. They're staring at each other, assessing one another, until they both crack smiles and laugh. Phil offers his arm, and the two head to that hotel room.

The two agents do not return to the helicarrier until mid afternoon the next day.


	8. She's been smiling

Something is obviously up with Agent Hill.

There are two crying interns, an agent who refuses to come out from under his desk, and a mission for the Avengers came up out of nowhere.

Director Fury has locked himself in his office and refuses to leave. He calls in Coulson, who is very perplexed, and explains.

"She's been smiling."

"Hill smiles, sir. It happens."

"No, Coulson. She smiled for no reason. She said 'okie dokie' without sarcasm. She brought in donuts for everyone."

"I don't understand, Director. Hill is perfectly capable of being nice for no reason."

"We both know that is an outright lie. That woman is a ticking time bomb. She's a trained killer. We only have so long."

"Sir, please tell me this is just a prank."

"Okay, so I'm not being that serious, but I honestly don't want to know or find out why she's so happy, and I know she wants to tell someone."

"..."

"So.. go find out. And report back. Dismissed."

Agent Coulson leaves more confused than when he entered and sets out to find Hill. It shouldn't be hard. There's a trail of people scampering away, looking for shelter. Phil sighs and shakes his head. What has gotten into Maria today to cause all this?

Hill is in her quarters and Coulson knocks soundly before calling her. From behind the door, he can hear shuffling and cursing. He calls out her name again, and she yells back, "Just a minute!"

He hears a loud crash and more cursing and starts putting in the five digit code to open her door but it opens for him before he can finish it. Her room is dim and it takes a moment for his eyes to adjust before he takes in what's in front of him. There is a birthday cake with lit candles on Maria's desk and dinner for two laid out. Maria's usually very standard bedding has been changed for a plush comforter and soft looking sheets. There is candlelight. Phil is confused.

Then Maria comes out of the bathroom in a very pretty dress that he knows will never leave this room unless in a safe because god forbid anyone sees her in this but him. He stares at her and she smiles back and goes to hug him, arms around his neck and holding on tight. He returns the hug, one arm at the small of her back and the other at the back of her head, and takes the time to enjoy this. He loves these little moments when they're Maria and Phil and not Hill and Coulson.

Maria pulls away and gives him a quick kiss before pulling him over to the lit cake and grinning like a fool. He's still a little confused.

"Not that I don't appreciate all of this, but what's the occasion?"

Maria rolls her eyes and points at the cake. "Your birthday, obviously."

Phil freezes for a moment and tries to remember the date. He looks down at his watch and realizes that his birthday is in fact a week away exactly. But it's a week away. Not today. And he's glad she reminded him because he could have sworn he had more time. They were going to the beach next weekend, just falling off the grid, and he had yet to find a reliable babysitter for Agent.

"Maria, my birthday is next week, though."

"Yes, but everyone is throwing you an office party on your birthday, and it's not going to be that good. Someone's going to smash the cake or burn your presents, I'm sure. So I'm throwing you a party early, so if the other one is terrible, at least you can say you had one good party."

Phil smiles and pulls Maria close again and just holds her. This is why they're together. They care about each other and they can sense disaster a mile away. They're a match.

Maria snuggles into him and then leans up a bit, barefoot tonight, to whisper in his ear. "I found Agent a babysitter for tonight. So blow out your candles and let's eat some cake." Holding onto her, Phil leans over and pauses, thinking about what to wish for, and blows out his candles. He pulls back to see Maria grinning and can't help but lean in for another kiss, but this time longer and softer. They pull apart, and Maria has gone from elated to sly. "Cake first or after?"

"During."

The next day, Agent Hill is normal. The Interns are skittish, but then again, they always are. The agent has finally come out from under his desk. The Avengers are still on their 'mission', but Fury is out of his office and to back to talking to Hill. He should really thank Coulson for fixing Hill, but then, he doesn't really want to look either one of them in the eye at the moment. He walked around agent quarters last night to make sure no one died, and heard things no one should hear.

He'll talk to Stark and Banner about soundproofing when they get back.


	9. Phil and Maria

It didn't start during a mission, or in an exotic location, or during a battle. It started like normal relationships. They were co-workers who had common interests and similar hobbies and enjoyed some of the same foods.

Agent Phil Coulson was top agent, Fury's "Good Eye", and was lucky enough to be the one who got to bring upcoming Agent Maria Hill, who is already known as a hard ass and has a reputation for tearing down new recruits, aboard the helicarrier. He toured her around with his normal nonchalance, and she followed him with a face of stone, giving noncommittal grunts to everything he said. They parted ways as acquaintances.

It wasn't long after that Hill was officially declared deputy director and became Fury's shadow. Coulson would often proxy through her, and her vice versa. There was one day Hill wasn't feeling that well and let her mind wander during a voice conference with Coulson, and he seemed to notice when she ended the call with a swift "Over and out." Coulson thought it strange at first, but soon it became his and Hill's way of ending calls. Through this, they became work friends.

At a SHIELD office party, because someone lobbied the union for more social gatherings so Fury granted the operatives a Christmas party, Hill stays in the control room the whole time, still in her SHIELD uniform and watching monitors. Coulson doesn't see her and sneaks in to avoid a few of the more tipsy agents. She doesn't recognize him at first, and they fight in the dim glow of the monitors until both of them realize they're on the same team. They are evenly matched, and thus spend the rest of the night talking about their training and special techniques and weapons. At some point, they get on the topic of sports and halloween costumes and pets, and they suddenly realize they have a lot in common. Even more so when they hear the tipsy agents down the hall and both pull back and assess the situation before jumping on the drunkards. On this night, they realize they are best friends.

Sometimes during meetings, they send each other texts, some of them about how an agent didn't fact check or how they're shaking in their boots in front of Fury. They're masters at it with their impassive faces. Other times, Coulson and Hill have conversations on the way to missions through their headsets. They always end with "Over and out." When Hill is alone in the control room and Coulson is driving by himself when these calls end, they allow themselves a smile.

Hill gets a mission after shadowing Fury for so long, and it makes Coulson nervous. She's skilled, no doubt, but she's been cooped up in a helicarrier for so long, her reflexes have slowed down a bit.

He calls her during her travel time from his room in California, and she gives him mission details and tells him all about how ready she is for this mission. He wishes her luck, which is something they never do, and Hill takes it to heart.

She calls him halfway through the mission, she's panting and she sounds so tired. Coulson gives her instructions, and she mumbles about how she already did that, and how this didn't work, and soon she's not replying at all. Coulson yells "MARIA!" into his com, but the line goes dead.

She's back on base the next day, and he tells her he's glad to see her in one piece. When they're in private, he tells her coldly that she needs to stop fooling around as Fury's lap dog, and she retorts that she's hardly the lap dog, she's not nicknamed the "Good Eye", she's not Fury's golden child. They don't talk for weeks after that.

During a meeting presented by a fairly nervous agent from logistics, the they make eye contact after a long time of cold shoulders and avoidance and terse conversations when they need to proxy for Fury. They rolls their eyes at each other, and send each other a text at the same time. All is forgiven.

They are back to best friends again, back to their "Over and out"s, and teasing new recruits, but instead of Coulson and Hill in each others phones, there is Maria and Phil, and when it's just them and they let themselves smile, she is Maria, and he is Phil, and say "Over and out".


	10. Coulson, Fury, and the cat

_the following fillet is written by Abi, who plays the Coulson to my Hill in our Avengers RP. you can check her out at downtonabi at tumblr_

* * *

Coulson normally didn't mind one-on-one meetings with Fury. They were usually just the basic mission stats, then a quick conversation about how much of a pain in the ass the Avengers were, and then they would nod and leave. Coulson considered Fury and him work friends - they got drunk sometimes together, but they were all business when it involved SHIELD. He enjoyed being Fury's right hand man and Fury once mentioned that Phil was the only person who didn't piss him off. This meeting was different though. There hadn't been a mission in months. This was about _the cat._

Fury was the first one to find out that he and Hill had gotten together. It was surprising how much a man with one eye could see. He just mentioned that he knew, told them to keep it private, and then told them to "get the fuck out of my office." Hill considered it his blessing, Coulson considered it a threat. If there was a break up that effected Hill's work, Fury would kick his ass. No problem.

"Coulson, good to see you," Fury greeted him as he entered the office.

"Boss. Another problem in New Mexico?"

"No, this involves something slightly more personal. I've been informed that you and Hill got a cat."

Coulson gave his eyebrows a raise that was usually only reserved for Stark's antics. There was no way that Fury hadn't known about the cat the minute Hill signed the adoption papers. Coulson had carefully searched all SHIELD personnel rules before letting Maria go into the adoption center. There was nothing about cats, but a lot about children.

He played along with Fury's antics, though, wondering what his Boss was getting at. "Yes, we adopted a cat. There weren't any rules against it. Not any that I was aware of, at least."

Fury chuckled. "There are no rules about pets. However, I understand that the Avengers have taken a liking to the fellow. An iron man cat suit? Really, Coulson?"

"That was all Stark, boss. The cat decided to go on an adventure and wound up with him and Banner. I wasn't even aware of it at the time."

"Yes, we heard all about Hill going insane and breaking the panel to the door to get to the damn cat. Something about a lack of pants?"

Coulson blushed. He had tried to get Maria to put on the pajama pants before she went on a rampage, but all she could think about the cat.

"Boss, I promise that will not happen again. The cat will remain in our barracks on the helicarrier and our suite at Stark Tower."

"Good. I expect nothing less from my best agent. Just no Iron Cat. Seriously. And if you let Rogers and Romanov dress up that cat and let it wander around my office again, I will make sure you have double Stark duty next time he has to go to LA."

"Yes, Boss." Coulson grimaced at the thought of babysitting Stark in LA. Stark hated LA. He turned to leave, planning to threaten the Avengers with a taser immediately and talk to Maria about her sleepwear.

"And Coulson?"

"Yes?"

"Tell Hill I like the cat's name. If you don't watch it, Agent will be my best agent."

Coulson smiled. Looks like Agent the cat would be the SHIELD mascot in no time.


	11. Pictures

Coulson's phone is missing, and both Hill and him and in a state of panic.

Everyone understands. That phone has Coulson's whole life on it. And Hill is very sympathetic to Coulson losing anything.

But no one sees Maria sneaking into rooms and ripping them apart for this phone. Or Phil trying to use Maria's phone to track the GPS on his blackberry.

They're frantic.

His phone may be password protected, but there's enough brain power on this helicarrier to get it open. And once its open, there's only so many cat photos before something disastrous happens.

They two find Coulson's blackberry on the floor of her room, right before they are called into a meeting. Maria leans on Phil and he kisses her temple. Thank god. Relief floods them and they straighten themselves up before heading to the meeting.

When they enter the briefing room, Fury is in his big chair with Agent on his lap. Agent mews at them, and Hill waves and elbows Coulson, and then they take their seats. They sit next to each other, casually close, and let the edges of their hands in their laps graze each other.

The rest of the team enters the room and the lights dim. The holoprojector in the middle of the table sparks to life and a spinning SHIELD logo materializes just as Stark and Banner walk to the front of the room, ready to present on their new findings.

The presentation starts dully, and Maria lets her eyes drift to Agent, who is glaring menacingly at one of the presenters like the good boy he is. She's just about to nudge Phil to look at Agent when Phil grabs her hand and squeezes hard. She looks at Phil, but he's staring straight forward. Maria follows his gaze and realizes a large picture of her in one of Phil's shirts with Agent licking her face is in the middle of the table.

"I uh.. I don't know how that got in there," Banner stammers, and swipes to the next picture on his tablet.

Now it's a picture of all three in bed, Hill in the same shirt and Coulson shirtless, kissing Hill on the temple, and Agent mewing at the camera overhead.

Banner swipes at the tablet again and this time it's a groggy Hill wrapped in the same shirt with a Agent sleeping on her head, wrapped in sheets.

Then it's Coulson in a Captain America Costume.

Coulson by a pool reading a book with his aviators on in his swim trunks.

Coulson drinking coffee and reaching for the camera.

And then Hill in a blue bikini in a hot tub waving.

Hill leaning against the balcony smiling in some casual clothes.

A close up of Hill with sprinkles all over her lips holding a donut.

A picture of Agent sleeping.

A slightly blurry shot of Coulson and Hill on a ski lift kissing each other.

And then Hill. In a bright blue bra and black underwear, smirking.

Hill in black underwear, spawned out on a chair, grinning.

Hill wrapped up in nothing but sheets.

And then, a slightly grainy picture of a content, sleeping Hill wrapped in those same sheets atop a grinning Coulson, wrapped in the same sheets.

Coulson is bright red and Hill is almost blue from holding her breath.

Everyone is frozen solid until the last picture pops up.

Coulson in his tight Captain America costume, holding Hill up by her ass and Hill's legs wrapped around his waist, wearing what appears to be a Canadian Flag bra and matching latex skirt, knee high red socks and chunky white heels, the two of them furiously making out.

A small giggle starts, and suddenly the whole room is roaring with laughter.

Hill snaps the electronic pen in front of her in half, and then bolts from the room. The laughter stop as soon as she's out the door, and everyone turn to Coulson who is now standing, watching her leave with a pained expression on his face. He stares everyone down, and then leaves the room, taking long strides to catch up to Hill.

He catches her right before she's about to lock herself in her room, and he can't help but stare at the tears in her eyes. She's embarrassed and ashamed and wants to crawl under something and die. No one will ever take her seriously again. Her life is ruined.

But Phil just pulls her in close and strokes her hair until she slumps against him and he can pull her inside her room. Once they're inside, they collapse on her bed and she clings to him. He hates seeing her this vulnerable, and if his place wasn't here, comforting her, he would he punishing whoever did this.

After a while, she calms down and they lay on their backs, Maria's head on Phil's shoulder, and Phil's arms wrapped around her.

"I will never be able to leave this room now."

"I'm not letting you stay in here forever."

"I was in my underwear, Phil. I was naked in some too."

"I know you're embarrassed, but you are so beautiful."

She turns and leans on her arm, searching his face.

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"You look amazing. The other guys were drooling when they weren't shocked."

Hill sighs and flops on Phil's chest. "But now, no one will take me seriously."

"You forget I was in some compromising positions in some of those shots too."

"We're so screwed now."

He laughs and pulls her up to him for a kiss and it escalates quickly. Before long, Maria's down to her tight uniform pants and bra, while Phil's shed his jacket, shoes, and pants. Phil is hovering over Maria, one hand on her hip ad the other supporting himself, while Maria has one hand gripping his tie and the other is under his shirt stroking his stomach, when there's a knock at the door.

They untangle themselves as best as they can, and Hill pulls a tee shirt on and cracks the door open to look out with one eye to see Stark standing there, far from the laughing mess he was earlier. Hill opens the door enough for her to slip out and slams it shut behind her. Barefoot and sweaty, she crosses her arms and glares at Stark, and blows some hair out of her face.

"Miss Hill."

"Agent Hill."

"...Agent Hill. I understand that I may have embarrassed you in the meeting today."

Hill says nothing. Doesn't move. Doesn't even look like she breathing, until she flares her nostrils at Stark.

"I just want to say that I'm sorry."

Hill nods once and then turns away and goes to open her door. She then realizes that earlier when she tried to storm in, she changed the code and set it to deadlock. Hill looks at Stark, who looks back at her and then looks around the hallway confused and stays put.

Hill runs a hand down her face and knocks on her door. "Agent Coulson. Let me in."

There's some rustling and a few seconds pass before the door opens and Coulson is standing in the doorway wearing his aviators and boxers, completely serious.

"OH GOD, MY EYES. I'M BLIND."

Stark covers his eyes and hurries away, leaving Maria to stare at Phil.

"You're just making things worse."

"I'm gave him something to think about next time he messes with us."

Maria rolls her eyes and goes for the hem of her shirt and heads inside her room. Phil closes the door behind her and turns off the lights.

The next day, Stark refuses to look Coulson in the eye, and for once, Coulson enjoys babysitting Stark.


	12. Vacation

For the first time in a while, Hill and Coulson are sent out on a mission together. An arms dealer is planning a sale in Aspen, under the guise of a family vacation. Coulson and Hill will run surveillance and reports on the sale, and after the transaction, apprehend everyone involved.

Their cover story is not an accident. They are Phillip and Mary Johnson, a newly wed couple on their honeymoon. They live in Ohio and have a terrier named Frank. Mary's parents love Phillip, but Phillip's parents disapprove of Mary. Maria and Phil find it hilarious, but in public, they are indifferent.

They and dropped off and the airport, and as soon as they're out of the car, they're in character. Phillip struggles to carry both of their bags and Mary is digging through her purse looking for their boarding passes.

"I swear they're in here somewhere."

""We're almost to baggage check, dear. The sooner you find them, the better."

They pass baggage and security like a breeze, and as they board the plane, a flight attendant comes over the speaker to announce that a pair of passengers are on their honeymoon. Maria looks for the pair, but is stopped by Phil pulling her up out of her seat. Mary is embarrassed and waves politely, and everyone is chanting "Kiss!" Phillip lays one on her hard, and her toes are curling when they pull away from each other and take their seats again. After the plane takes off, the flight attendant brings them complimentary champagne and Phillip doses off on her shoulders halfway through the flight.

They land in Aspen, check in with SHIELD, and take a taxi to their hotel. They're a giggling mess in the backseat, and they apologize and inform the driver they're in their honeymoon. He understands and gives them a discount.

As they check into the hotel, Hill spots the arms dealer. Mary kisses Phillip on the cheek and informs him she's going to get something to drink in the hotel bar while he finishes up. Maria tails the arms dealer into the bar and sits five stools away and enjoys a glass of iced tea. The dealer glances at her, and Mary smiles and waves. He comes over and sits down next to her and introducer himself.

"Hey there, little lady. Name's Michael Figuari. Pretty little thing like you here all by herself?"

Mary giggles and blushes, before looking towards the doorway and spotting Phillip. She looks back to Michael and smiles. "I'm actually here with my husband. We're on our honeymoon."

"Well, if you change your mind, I'm up in room 35."

"She won't."

Michael turns to see an jealous Phillip glaring daggers. He eases off and laughs.

"Don't worry, man. I'm just playing with your little wifey. Got a cute one," Michael jokes, and then heads for the door, but not before winking at Mary.

Mary kisses Phillip hard and then pulls away, still holding onto his button down shirt. "Phillip, honey, you know you're the only guy for me." They both smile and head up to their room, kissing and laughing in the elevator. Phillip carrier her into their room, and once the door is shut, they start unpacking.

Hill unpacks all the surveillance equipment and sets up to monitor room 35, while Coulson goes ahead and starts assembling their gear and weapons.

"The deal is taking place on the top of the double black diamond trail in two hours."

"What is it with dealers and black diamonds?"

"I have no idea, but we should probably start putting on our ski gear and head out."

"We have some time before..."

An hour and a half later, the two are dressed and sitting on the ski lift for the trail. Alone in their chair, Phillip pulls out their phone and snaps a shaky picture of the two of them kissing, and then Coulson and Hill are going over their plan.

The exchange goes flawlessly, and Hill and Coulson grab the dealer and his buyers with little to no effort. In hindsight, this mission was far below their skill set. It only makes it more obvious that this is a set up.

They needed a vacation, but they're both too attached to work. They got just what they wanted.

When they return from their mission, Fury congratulates them on a job well done, and then sits everyone down to talk about the genius weapon designer Tony Stark's return, and sends Coulson out to debrief Stark.

A year later, when Coulson is in California and Hill is running the helicarrier, they both remember their vacation. Maria brings it up in their daily phone call, and Phil sends her the picture he snapped aboard the ski lift.


	13. Dreams

_inspired by hornse-ebooks high school au art on tumblr_

* * *

She has dreams sometimes when she's snuggled in bed. There's a kitten sleeping on her chest and two strong arms wrapped around her body and a warm mouth on her temple. She doses off and suddenly she's somewhere else.

The Manhattan School for the Gifted has an assortment of children and teens in its hands. Some of the world's brightest, some richest, and some most talented. Coach Hill knows all of them fairly well from what she can gather in her gym class. But there is a group she knows far too well from having to watch them in detention every Saturday.

She volunteers to run detention for the year to make some extra money. The school has had some cutbacks on salaries every since some students blew up half of the science department, and there's no way she and her fiancée can afford their wedding on their tiny salaries.

This Saturday morning, Maria is woken up by her fiancée nudging her and groaning to turn off the alarm clock. She reaches over him and hits the snooze and starts kissing his sleepy face until the alarm goes off again. She has an hour before detention starts, but she doesn't want to get out of bed. Phil realizes this when Maria has her hands halfway down his pants and gently pushes her out of the bed. She grumbles and gets ready. If he wasn't the vice principal and her fiancée, she would kick his ass.

Maria sits in the library with lesson plans and wedding magazines, and waits for her students to arrive. On the list for today is Tony Stark and Bruce Banner, serving a year long sentence of detentions for destruction of the science department, Steve Rogers, serving two weeks for getting into an argument with a teacher over WWII, Natasha Romanov and Clint Barton serving four weeks for robbing a vending machine and a bullying some freshmen, and Thor and Loki Odinson serving five weeks for fighting in the halls and using eighth graders as weapons.

Natasha and Clint come in first and greet her, which makes Maria happy. She's almost glad to see them in her dentition group because even if they can be delinquents, they are the most well behaved kids in her gym class and always makes them team captains. Rogers is next, apologizing for being late, even though he's ten minutes early and sits down in front of her and smiles. There's an eagle on his tee shirt and he's wearing some very well iron khaki pants. There might be gel in his hair. Maria smiles and then flips through a magazine and reads an article about napkin folding while Thor in his football jersey, Loki, and the very shy Bruce walk in and sit down.

Stark rolls in ten minutes late in his pajama and bedhead. He waltzes up to her desk and throws on the charm. "Coach Hill, you are looking radiant today. Is that a new track jacket? Trying out new toothpaste? Whatever it is, you're looking drop dead gorgeous and I'm noticing."

Coach Hill rolls her eyes. "Stark, do you want another year of detention?"

"Not really, ma'am."

"Then sit down and shut your mouth."

Detention only lasts six hours, but Maria swears it lasts a lifetime. She flips between planning her classes and working on her health lessons for the teens and the seating chart for the reception. Halfway through the day, Principal Fury checks in and they chat about the upcoming school dance and how her and Vice Principal Coulson will be chaperoning.

While this happens, Tony and Bruce work on their science fair project, Steve doodles in his notebook, Thor has a one-sided conversation with his younger brother about sports, Loki watches Steve doodle, Clint is curled up in his chair and naps, and Natasha is filing her nails and playing Temple Run on her phone under the table.

Fury leaves, and Hill notices there's still two hours before she can leave. She's halfway through her lesson plan on Changes in the Teenage Body when the fire alarm goes off. She looks up, expecting to see the fire right in front of her, but only sees her students wide eyed and looking around frantically.

Coach Hill gets up from her desk and takes a peak into the hallway. She can see the west exit with no problems, but the lights in the east hallway are flickering. She leaves to library and walks east, only to smell smoke a few steps in. Small flames start appearing, and Maria sprints back to the library and calmly walks in.

"Alright guys, there's nothing to worry about, but we're going to need to evacuate. I want everyone in a straight line and silent." She watches them slowly get up and form a line and leads them out of the room and towards the west exit. She commands all of them to keep their eyes forward and not stop moving, and does her best not to look behind her. Once she's outside and has the kids lined up on the sidewalk, it's pretty obvious the building is on fire. The kids are wide eyed and staring at her, but Coach Hill starts talking about TV shows and decides to take her students out for ice cream. From the ice cream shop, everyone calls their parents to get picked up, except for Steve who doesn't have a phone and his parents are working late. The two of them sit at the ice cream shop and talk about school until Vice Principal Coulson stop by to pick them up.

Steve and Coulson have a very spirited conversation about World War II while Maria finally clenches the seating arrangement. They drop him off in Brooklyn, and realize he walked and took the subway to get to detention. Maria walks him to the door of his building and offers him a ride next weekend. Steve, who enjoyed the ride, agrees, and wishes them a good day and heads inside.

In the car on the way home, Maria turns to Phil and grabs his hand. Steve has always been a sweet kid. He used to be so tiny, many teachers often worried about him. The nurse almost stalked him, terrified he would break. But after hitting puberty and moving into a new foster family, he's been getting stronger. Soon, he'll be heading off into the world, planning to sign up for the army even though his sponsors could put him through college.

"Remember two years ago when everyone on staff was making plans to adopt little Steve Rogers?"

Phil has his eyes on the road and grunts in confirmation.

"I seriously wish we had. He's such a good kid."

Maria Hill wakes up in a cold sweat. She bolts upright, and Agent falls into her lap. Phil jerks awake beside her and watches her pant.

"Maria, it's three in the morning. What's wrong?"

She rubs her hands down her face and calms herself down with a sigh. That was such a weird dream.

"I think I dreamed about trying to adopt Captain America and high school and..." But the dream is gone, out of her mind before she can finish, and she lies back down and is once again surround by two strong arms, and Agent curls up on her with caution.

It becomes a reoccurring dream for her, but she never remembers much of it.


	14. Blame

_I would like to make a warning that this ficlet is a little more sensitive than my others, which is why it is posted on its own at first, but I feel like it needs to be a part of the set__. If anything in this fillet offends anyone, I'm sorry and please feel free to message me about it so we can talk. Thank you._

* * *

The news hits that she's in a hospital somewhere in New York City. The Avengers are finishing up a fight in North Texas, and Coulson is there to get things covered up and cleaned. SHIELD has no idea where she is, other than a hospital somewhere in New York, and Coulson tries to justify not running off to New York the second he gets the news by claiming he has no idea where to start looking.

Once all the dust has settled and everyone is heading back to Stark Tower, he gets the call that she's in the St. Luke's-Roosevelt's Hospital Center and someone needs to claim her before local law enforcement starts digging into things. She's listed under her old cover name, Mary Johnson, which drags up memories, but the happy flashbacks stop when he calls the hospital and is told to come by as soon as possible.

Phil is terrified when he hears this.

He informs the nurse he's on his way and hangs up before she can finish saying goodbye. He is offered one of Stark's fancy cars, Roger's motorcycle, and a helicopter to get there, but Coulson calls for a taxi and leaves quietly.

He goes to the front desk and asks for the room of Mary Johnson. The nurse pulls out a file and then looks up at Coulson and smiles. "Are you Phillip Johnson? Her husband?" she asks sweetly.

Coulson nods and pulls out the dummy drivers license he's held onto just incase and flashes it to the nurse like it's his badge. The nurse's smile gains a sad, yet relieved tint, and she turns to make a call. A few minutes later, a taller man in a lab coat comes down the hall and holds out a hand to greet Coulson.

"Mr. Johnson, I'm Dr. Avery. I helped lead your wife's emergency surgery. If you'll come with me, I'll take you to see her."

Coulson shakes his hand hard and murmurs thanks, and follows hot on the heels of Dr. Avery to the recovery ward. The doctor stop in front of what Coulson assumes is Hill's room, and turns with her chart in hand and a grim look on his face. Coulson is given a laundry list of injuries.

Her left leg is broken, right wrist sprained, four ribs cracked, right foot fractured, two fingers broken on her left hand, a large burn on her left arm, a strong concussion, and four bullets were removed from her stomach. She had lost consciousness for a while, but she had pulled through despite her blood loss and was looking great.

Phil has to lean on the wall for a second, because the long list makes him sick to his stomach. The doctor gives him some time, and then opens the door and informs Coulson that he'll be back in an hour to check over Mary, and she probably won't be very responsive until her anesthesia is fully out of her system in a few hours and her pain relievers wear off.

Phil walks in and sees her hooked up to machines and covered in bandages and parts of her are held up in braces. She's pale and covered in scratches. She looks like a broken doll. Especially when he sees her face. Her eyes are wide open and staring at the ceiling, empty.

"...Maria...?"

Her eyes turn to him, and he is slightly relieved. He grabs the chair next to her and sits down to just look at everything.

"You won't be stable enough to get out of where for a while," he finally says.

Maria looks away and sighs.

A few hours pass and Maria is in and out of consciousness. Dr. Avery comes in and out every so often, and the nice nurse from the front continuously checks in on them, offering Coulson blankets and food and coffee, but he politely declines and watches Supernanny on the TV in the corner while he waits for Maria to come to.

He makes a call to SHIELD, telling them he has located Hill and she won't be able to move for a while. Fury sends flowers the next day.

Phil lurks around the hospital for a few days before Maria is finally clear headed enough to stay awake for a conversation. She tells Dr. Avery where it hurts when he checks on her, and chats with the nurse about the weather and favorite foods, but never says a word to Phil. She turns to say something to him, possibly about changing the channel, once, but she freezes with her mouth open and just stares at him until she turns away and tries to go to sleep. He wants to be hurt when this happens, but the look on her face makes him too concerned.

Phil doses off in his chair, and as soon as Maria is sure he's asleep, she starts to cry.

These past few days, she's been working hard at keeping this from him. Part of it is due the fact that she's hardly conscious, but also because Maria Hill is an expert at hiding things underneath her cold exterior. But tonight she is clear headed and her emotions start hitting her in giant waves. A few tears later and she sobbing with no way to cover her face or hide when Phil finally hears her and is alert in seconds.

They're staring at each other, and she's crying so hard it's difficult to keep her eyes open, but she forces herself to keep looking at him because he has to know. She can't keep ignoring him and pretending nothing has happened. She can't hide this from him.

He hurries to start wiping away her tears and smooth her hair back from her face. It's such a sweet gesture, but it makes her cry harder because she feels she doesn't deserve this kind of treatment. She pulls away and thrashes and mumbles, and he is seconds away from getting the nurse when she finally gets her voice.

"Phil."

He freezes, and she can tell he doesn't like her tone. She sounds more broken than she looks.

"Please sit down. I've.. I have to tell you something."

He does as she asks eventually and sits stiffly at her bedside, waiting.

Maria wants to look away, she doesn't want to say anything and pretend life will be normal once she heals, but it's a lie and if she doesn't tell Phil, she knows he's not going to be to handle being around her, and he'll leave her. Though, Maria is pretty sure he'll leave her once he's found out what she's done.

"I went out for a walk, I wanted to clear my head a little. And then this crazy little man is running through the park, holding this screaming little girl, and I just went after him. He was determined to get away, but I chased him down. That's how I got the burns and sprains, I think. I chased him down and I got that girl out of his hands and then I went to finish the job... I got ambushed, then. I thought I was fine, but I was slow and tired and I just wasn't right. They took my gun."

Phil grabs hold of the railing on her hospital bed, and squeezes until his knuckles are white. It scares her, but she clears her throat, thick with tears, and finishes.

"When they got me here, they had to cut me open to stop the bleeding, and they found.." She has to stop for a second to keep herself from turning into a sobbing wreck, and forces herself to calm down.

"Phil, I was pregnant."

His face is blank at first, but Maria turns away before she can see anything else.

"I was pregnant, and I just threw myself in the line of fire. Almost three months along."

The silence in the room is killing her, and Maria just lets herself go and tears start pouring. She blames it on her medicine, but honestly, she's so heartbroken and ashamed. There is a child Phil never got to meet because she was so stupid.

She finally notices that Phil is leaned over, wiping her tears again, making shushing noises, and stroking her hair again, so she just lets everything out.

"Phil, I got our baby killed."

But he shushes her again, and Maria realizes that she would give anything to be able to be held by him right now, yet stitches and broken bones are keeping her from being able to do anything.

Hours later, Maria is asleep and Phil talks with Dr. Avery about recovery. Physical therapy is in their future, lots of it, but the doctor has little to offer on mental recovery. Phil is aware this will take time, time he necessarily does not have, but he's going to do everything he can. This news has broken him apart, but he's so terrified that Maria is in such tiny pieces she'll never be okay.

Maria agrees to letting the team know about her situation, especially since Maria won't be able to get on the helicarrier once she's released from the hospital, and will have to look for somewhere to stay until she's healthy enough to return to work, and Phil will be sure to help her, thus spending less time in Stark Tower.

The Avengers are very relieved to hear Agent Hill is recovering and doing well. Stark offers to let Hill recover in the tower when he realizes no one had already planned on it, and everyone steps up to offer their help. Then Coulson tells them the full story and they are silent. No one knows what to say, and that's possibly the most painful thing. Eventually, Rogers puts his hand on Coulson's shoulder and says, "I'm sorry." It doesn't help much, but it helps.

A few weeks later, Maria is released, and everyone comes to the hospital to pick her up. During her stay, she had requested no visitors, but now she's going to have to face people who know what she did and can have an opinion on it, and she contemplates pulling open hers stitches to avoid it a little longer.

There are balloons and flowers and teddy bears awaiting her in the van they rented to get her to Stark Tower, and as soon as everyone catches sight of her casts, Banner hands her the orchid he got her and asks if he can sign one. Still a bit loopy on her pain killers, Hill is Maria, and smiles, laughs, and holds out her leg. Everyone signs, and the signatures get progressively bigger and colorful until the nurse comes in with a wheel chair.

A physical therapy specialist comes up to the tower, and when the team has to head out, a nurse comes by to help Maria get around and feed herself and Agent. Maria is healing, physically, but only Phil know she's still blaming herself about the miscarriage, and that's because she still cries about it when she thinks no one is looking.

One day, she is fully healed and gets to training herself to rejoin Fury on the helicarrier. Phil knows she needs it. She's still healing mentally, and even though most people will argue that bottling your emotions is a terrible thing to do, he knows that ordering around people and strutting around being tough is just what she needs.

Eventually, she stops blaming herself, but it takes time. Time neither one thought they had.


	15. I have a girlfriend

The words spill out far too easily for Agent Coulson.

But ever since Coulson got assigned to babysitting duty, Stark has been driving him crazy. Calling through his giant house making strange requests instead of actually working. Chatting like a crazy person when he has a clear time limit. If only Coulson could tase him for real.

Stark comes in over the intercom again, and Coulson is seriously debating going to beat him with a piece of broken furniture, but that would probably be a bad idea.

"So, I heard you and Miss Potts once went out for dinner. That's cool, you know, getting involved with the civilians. I mean, Pepper's a nice woman. That's why I put her in charge. She's nice, but she can be really mean. But it's fine. No big de-"

"I have a girlfriend."

"...Oh."

Coulson is ready to slam his head against a wall then. Stark is going to ask so many questions and probably die trying to pry into Coulson's life, but Stark is silent. In fact, Stark stays silent for the next couple of hours. Coulson is relieved. The last thing he wants is for Stark to try to hack into SHIELD files and pull things up, but avoiding a territorial battle with him is good enough.

Coulson checks the cameras and see Stark working seriously and sighs. Safe for another day.

His phone rings and he checks the caller ID.

Speak of the devil.

Stark comes in to upgrade the helicarrier, and Agent Hill is put on babysitting duty. She already dislikes him, but now as she is forced to watch him go through files and play and made snarky comments, she understands why everyone hates watching this man.

She hates him even more when he turns to her and starts talking.

"So what's a beautiful woman like you doing in SHIELD. I mean, Natasha, I understand, she's crazy, but you seem only a little, well, bitchy, if I may say. Have you thought about modeling?"

Hill stares at him blankly until he turns away from her and goes back to work.

"Probably don't get laid ever on this helicarrier. That must be why you're so grumpy. I know a guy or two I could set you up with if you need some loving. One guy-"

"I have a boyfriend."

"...Oh."

The words spill out too easy, and Hill instantly regrets giving away her secret. But Stark doesn't even seem to care about her existence anymore and works on his designs, and Hill begins typing a few reports for Fury while keeping an eye on Stark.

A few hours later, Coulson comes in to collect the reports, and stop to chat a little. They don't notice their audience until Stark clears his throat.

"You know, smartest man on the helicarrier, and I would have never figured out you two were together until now."

Coulson immediately takes a step back and Hill drops the reports she's holding. They scatter all over the floor, but neither one move an inch.

Thirty seconds later, Fury comes in, asking for those reports and Coulson and Hill swiftly pick them off the ground and hand them over. Fury shakes his head at them and then smirks at Stark and leaves. Coulson follows Fury out, but pauses at the door. Making sure Stark sees, he winks at Hill, and then exits.

Stark turns to question Hill, but she puts her hand up as soon as he opens his mouth and tries to listen to her com-link .

"The team is ready to get to work whenever you are, Stark."


	16. Motherhood

Maria swears her life is slowly becoming a cheap comic book.

She remembers growing up in Ontario, moving to Chicago, going through armed forces training, getting picked for SHIELD, climbing up to her current position. She remembers her life not being this ridiculous. But she supposes this is what her life is now.

She's a grown woman with a cat and a boyfriend who plays babysitter to three science experiments and an otherworlder. Her job is to help run a levitating hive of weapons, planes, and agents. She should just accept this and move on.

She's not sure on the specifics, if it was alien, Asguardian, magical ponies, or drugs, but there was a mission and a fight, and the team came home with two crying infants wrapped in spandex, and missing two members.

Tasha seems to be the only one doing anything about the crying children, while the other members of the team look around worriedly and Coulson gives her a deadpan look. Maria rolls her eyes and scoops up the two babies, starts rocking and cooing to them, and they are suddenly quiet and then gurgling happily.

While Natasha is perfectly capable of taking care of two miniaturized super heroes, the job falls to Maria because childcare is her hidden talent, and because as much as Fury enjoys seeing the team panicking over babies, he can't handle the crying.

The team is informed that the process lasts two weeks. In two weeks, the two sleeping babies in Maria's arms will be full grown adults. Maria wishes it was shorter. She's not sure how she feels about Tony Stark chewing on her hair and Steve Rogers tugging on her shirt, and if they remember any of this, it will be plenty awkward. For two weeks, Maria is code named Mother Hen, and stationed at Stark Tower. SHIELD drops off the necessary supplies and the team heads to Stark tower to recoup.

Maria isn't sure how she's supped to take care of a baby who's got a flashlight in his chest and another one with muscles, but she doesn't question it. It's only two weeks of caring for children. It will be over before she knows it.

The first couple of nights go terrible. Stark and Rogers share a crib in Maria's room. Maria is up every three hours feeding, changing diapers, and rocking. The crying wakes everyone up, so Thor, Clint, Natasha, and Bruce have movie marathons and Coulson attends when he's not helping Maria. They express their issues with the crying children, and Fury sends them on special tasks and missions while their fellow team members grow up.

One morning, Maria is up at 5am, Steve on her hip and Tony in a high chair, cooking breakfast. Everyone wanders into the kitchen area around 6am to find Maria feeding the two and eating her own breakfast while watching Sesame Street. It's almost unnerving to see. Sometimes, they sit in front of the big TV and watch Rollie Pollie Ollie, and Natasha comes and plays with them, and Maria goes to take a nap. When they get bigger, Maria takes them for a walk in the park in a wide stroller, and even the zoo.

Eventually, they grow from babies to toddlers to children. They're starting to remember themselves, but only in the most childish of ways. Steve finds a toy Iron Man mask around the house and Tony manages to get a hold of the shield, and Maria has to stifle her laughter when they sit at the dinner table with Agent and plan a mission.

They're almost the same as when they're adults, except she finds it rather adorable since they're both three feet tall. Tony refuses to eat his vegetables and Steve won't eat his macaroni unless she uses food coloring to make it blue. They spend all day watching Batman cartoons and Justice League Unlimited and whine when Maria turns off the TV for bedtime. They're children, and Maria almost enjoys it.

One night, long after she's put the two boys to bed, she hears whimpering. At first she assumes it's Agent, but that's ruled out when she finds him pacing in front of Steve's room. She opens the door and finds the two boys huddled together, and notices the noise is coming from both of them.

Maria knocks quietly, and watches their silhouettes shudder and then turn to her. Maria steps into the room and closes the door behind her softly. She turns on the bedside lap to find the two red eyed and puffy. She swiftly picks up Tony and takes his spot in the bed, plopping him in her lap, and pulls Steve over to her. The two quiet down a little bit, and Maria strokes their hair until their breathing slows down.

"So who wants to tell me what happened?" she whispers to them.

Tony shakes his head and curls into Maria's neck, but Steve takes a deep breath and tries to talk. "Tony had a dream he died. It was really scary," is all he can manage before he starts crying again. Tony hasn't stopped yet.

Maria does what she thinks is best and tells them a story about two big, brave, strong men who helped lead a team to victory and led great lives and were happy. It's a twist on the truth, she knows, but it's a child's bedtime story, and she's not going to talk about drinking problems and PTSD. The two drift off near the end snuggled into her, so Maria stays put the rest of the night. At some point in the night, she swears she hears someone whisper, "Mommy," but Maria lets it go. This is temporary, and she's just babysitting two grown men who happen to be children.

The two weeks is almost up, and Maria finds that her boys are now teenagers. And boy, do they have really bad teenage boy problems. They smell terrible and frustrate her to no end, but she can't help but worry when Steve asks if he and tony and go see a movie. While they're gone, Maria admits to herself that she's got a serious soft spot for them, and she's going to miss them being two little babies at 3am crying for a diaper change.

Before she knows it, the two weeks are up, and it's like it never happened.

Hill stops by Stark Tower one night to spend some time with Coulson and collect a few things she left behind, and Rogers asks her to stay for dinner. Stark regrettably explains they're having something delivered from a cheap taco place nearby, but Hill takes the hint and whips up a meatloaf, mashed potatoes, peas, and blue macaroni.

The whole team sits down for the meal and goes to load up their plates. Before she knows what she's doing, Maria is cutting up Stark's meatloaf and loading Roger's plate up with blue macaroni, but what shocks her is when they two men say, "Thanks, Mom," and "You're the best, Mom," in-between mouthfuls.

Everyone else is shocked too, and Tony and Steve freeze when they realize what just happened.

Coulson looks around the table, then grabs another slice of meatloaf and goes back to eating. Everyone else follows suit, though it takes Maria, Steve, and Tony a few seconds to catch up, and Clint begins a conversation about a new movie trailer he saw.

Maria looks across the table at Tony and Steve and sighs. She wonders if motherhood is supposed to be this awkward, but shakes her head and tucks into her meal before she can get emotional.

Later that night, Maria is sitting on a couch, waiting for Coulson to walk her to her transport when Steve and Tony shyly walk in and ask her to tell them that story. They fall asleep onto of her near the end.


	17. Paternity

Maria is nervous.

She's always told people both her parents are dead. She tells a lie about her father every time someone asks her about her family. Her mother died giving birth to her, that is true. But she says her father died when she was in the army, and that's a blatant lie.

Coulson knows it's a lie, as well as Romanov and Fury. They have access to her file and the address to his nursing home is on there.

So Maria is nervous when Phil asks her about her father for the first time. They're getting serious, they've always been serious, but now it seems like… He wants to know more about her.

She tries to deflect all the questions she can. She hates keeping things from him, but this is one thing she wishes she could just leave behind her once and for all. She tells him about being born in Ontario, and how her father moved them to Chicago after her mother was put in the ground. She mentions how she always wanted to live in Ontario with her grandmother, but never got the chance.

She tries her best to make the few highlights of her childhood stretch out into long, thoughtful happy memories, and when something comes off as pathetic, she tries to laugh it off and smile.

There finally comes a day where he asks to meet her father. The thought terrifies her. Maria hasn't seen her father in years for a reason. But she smiles and agrees to it, and before she knows it, they're in Chicago, sitting in a nursing home, waiting for Mr. Hill to join them.

Maria sits perfectly straight with a wispy smile on her face and glazed over eyes. When her father walks in, he casually greets her and shakes Phil's hand roughly before plopping down.

"So, you're the guy who's with Maria?"

"Yes. I'm her boyfriend."

"Heh."

Years have passed, and it shouldn't bother her, but Maria still flinches. She knows Phil caught her do it out of the corner of his eye, and she knows he's already started to figure out her secret.

They chat about the weather and hockey games, and somehow end up on the topic of Maria's mother. Her father pulls out a picture from his wallet and hands it to Phil.

"She was the light of my life. The most beautiful woman in the world. I miss her everyday. It's such a shame Maria didn't turn out to look like her at all," her father laments.

Maria is frozen in place, smiling with her hands folded in her lap and looking at the wall behind her father. She doesn't catch the way Phil's jaw twitches or how he grips the picture of her mother and roughly hands it back. She tunes out when her father starts talking again, smile glued to her face and eyes glossed over. It's an old coping mechanism she developed in grade school. It works well now, because she's a grown woman, but when she was younger, it was flawed.

She still remembers when he used to throw plates and books and chairs in her direction. How he used to scream himself hoarse about how she killed her own mother and ruined his life, and how she used to not talk for days. How she never told anyone about any of it until a teacher witnessed her father insulting her on school property.

And how nothing changed until she finally left.

Maria's mind is focused elsewhere, going over mission files, planning a conference call to Fury and a few agents about some reports she finished. She doesn't hear anything around her until Phil lightly touches her arm.

"Maria, please go wait in the car."

She snaps out of it immediately and turns to Phil with that same fake smile. "Why? What's wrong?"

"Go wait in the car, Maria."

"Phil, Why do I need to-"

"Hill, go get in the car now."

His tone frightens her, but he pats her arm and hands her the car keys, and Maria tells her father goodbye and heads for the parking lot.

She sits in the passenger seat for two minutes before Phil leaves the building. His face is emotionless, and so she in turn goes back to her dumb smile, and they drive to their hotel in silence. The whole drive, she steals glances at him, and panics in her head. She's terrified. What happened? What's going to happen?

He's still silent in the hotel lobby, but when they head to the elevator, they are joined by a family with two young daughters. The mother and father chat with Phil, and Phil engages in the conversation, but doesn't directly address her, as if she's not even there.

Cold terror is running through her veins when they reach their floor. He wishes the family goodbye and leads her to their room, unlocks the door and holds it open for her. As soon as she's far enough inside, he slams to door shut behind him.

In the darkness of their room, she feels him wrap himself around herald hold onto her tight. She immediately relaxes, and when he starts to rub her back, she comes to. She holds onto him just as tight and trembles. She feels him lead her to their bed and lays down onto of him. He's still rubbing her back when he whispers, "I'm so sorry, Maria."

In half a second, her walls break down, and she let's herself cry openly into his chest. He rubs her back and strokes her hair and repeats variations of "I'm so sorry," with every breath.

Hours later, Maria has cried so much she feels numb, and she tells Phil snippets of her day to day growing up. There are good days and bad days, there are dramatic events and peace. When she finishes, he holds her tight and kisses her forehead.

"I'm sorry, Maria. I will never let that man near you ever again," he promises, and Maria trusts him completely.


	18. Reassemble

_I just wanted to let you guys know that I have another story with the CoulsonXHill pairing on my profile that I'm keeping separate from this collection of ficlets. I will be updating both regularly. The two collections run on separate timelines, in case you were wondering. So please check it out! Thanks! 3_

* * *

For once, everything seems to be at peace. Well, peaceful enough. There really never is peace, but SHIELD has finally gotten to the point where they don't need a response team ready to go at a moments notice. And so they inform the Avengers of such.

It seems strange. They came together in the middle of a war, split apart, and then came back together for such a long time. And now, they're heading back their separate ways. Stark Tower remains a central part of their lives, and each one has access to it at all times, but Stark goes back in Malibu, Banner to Nepal, Thor in-between Asgard and an observatory , Rogers splitting time between the helicarrier and army, Romanov off doing missions, Barton running defense while a new barn is built in New Mexico, Coulson out in the field, and Fury and Hill keeping the whole operation in order.

They keep in contact, or try to, but life is always a busy mess, and sometimes there's no signal or mailing address. They drift apart, but never very far, because after all they've been through, you can never really forget or leave behind each other.

So when five years pass, and everyone gets a message to meet at Stark Tower in three days, it's like a family reunion.

Stark is the first one there, of course. It's his tower, and he just finished upgrading the boosters on his suit. Thor flies in next, landing on the veranda with a crater. The two begin to catch up when Banner and Barton arrive in the elevator. It really is a reunion now. It only gets more emotional when Romanov and Rogers arrive, already chatting and laughing. It turns into a real family reunion, hugging and reminiscing about five years ago.

But they finally get to the reason they're all here. They've been assembled, but for what?

The answer arrives with Coulson and Fury.

The two walk out of the elevator with purpose, and everyone gathers at the dinner/meeting table.

"I see you all got my message," Fury says.

Fury can see things start to click into place from their faces. It almost makes him laugh. Except it doesn't, because he has more serious things to think about.

"We've got intel that someone is trying to bring back the fight to Earth. Another division has been handling this case for the past year, but three days ago, the talks went sour, and we may have another invasion on our hands. "

Coulson begin typing into the keypad on the table, and images of strange ships, profiles of familiar faces, and a time line of events pop up on several screens. Stark pulls the specs on a ship near him and scrolls through it. "So, same plan as last time? Disable the invasion leader and then clean up, right?" Stark asks with nonchalance.

Coulson clears his throat, "The division handling this case would prefer that we handle things peacefully and use force as a final effort. You're being assembled as a back up plan. Until they call us in, we're going to be on stand-by."

"So with that said, stay on alert, and don't leave the tower. We need you ready to go at a moment's notice," Fury finishes. He quickly swipes away the screens and leaves in the elevator without looking back.

A few tense moments pass, and soon everyone is back to reuniting. Snacks are brought out, and they congregate around the couch and share stories of their last five years.

Stark talks about new tech with Banner, and Romanov and Barton share the unclassified bits of their missions while Thor, Rogers, and Coulson sit on the couch, and Thor blabbers about Jane and her strange glass dome. As Thor goes on, Steve turns to Coulson.

"So, how Agent? I haven't seen that fur ball in forever!"

Coulson smiles and pulls out his phone. "He's doing great. He's gotten really big in the past five years. I took a picture of him the other day to show you guys." Coulson hands Rogers the phone, and Steve looks down at a full grown cat, who is lounging atop a little girl.

"Oh, wow! He has gotten big," Steve exclaims. The he clears his throat. "... If you don't mind me asking, but who's the little girl?"

"Ah," Coulson sighs happily, "That's Louise. She just had her third birthday last week. Disney princesses themed. Nothing better than a house full of screaming toddlers in princess dresses."

Steve scrunches his eyes brows and really looks at the little girl. He doesn't like how Coulson sidestepped his question, and something about this girl is bothering him. He peers over at Thor, who is still raving about glass circles and computers, and looks back at Coulson's grinning face.

"So, uh.. Is Agent Hill making an appearance?"

"Yes, she just had some things to finish up, but she'll be here tomorrow."

The conversation goes back to Thor, but Steve can't help but feel something nagging at him. The little girl must have been Coulson's niece, but Steve doesn't remember Coulson saying anything about having relatives. But she has to be his niece or at least second cousin, because they have the same smile.

Everyone shares celebratory shawarma for dinner, and sets up in case they get called during the night, and then huddle back into their familiar rooms for the night. Stark is the last one to head to bed, still working on an upgrade to the suit when exhaustion finally kicks in.

As he heads to his suite, he can't help but overhear Coulson on the phone in hushed tones.

"I swear, she left Mr. Snuggles in the living room last night. It was there when I left this morning... I know she can't sleep without it... Did you try singing to her again...? Okay, tell her the story about the two spies in Aspen. Just edit out the bad parts... I am not questioning your parenting skills, dear. You are a wonderful mother... No, honey, please don't cry. I know it all seems really difficult right now, but everything is going to be fine. I'm sure the babysitter can handle her. Who did you get anyways...? My dad? Shouldn't he be... Oh. Drive safe, then..."

Stark tiptoes away and turns the corner before he can hear, "Love you too, over and out."

At breakfast, it feels like five years hasn't passed for any of them, except no one is in their pajamas, just in case Fury calls and give them the green light.

A very heated discussion about the season finale of Community almost reaches it's climax when the elevator doors ping and slide open. Maria Hill struts in, hand on her earpiece, obviously talking with Fury, while the other carrying a large amount of files propped against her stomach and a duffle bag on her shoulder.

"I just don't understand why they couldn't put the agents I suggested on the mission... Yes, I know it's above their rank, but.. I am aware they are above SHIELD influence, sir, but... I understand, sir, but-... Understood."

The call ends when Maria makes it to the breakfast bar. She stands across the bar from the team, same stonewalled, icy look on her face since the first day she met, and gives them a good look over. Once done, she turns to Coulson, pulls away his cereal bowl of Fruit Loops and dumps it in the sink. "Phil, you are well aware that you are not allowed to eat sugary cereals," Hill lectures. She then plops down the files in front of him and then drops the duffle onto of them. "I packed enough for three days, and your blood pressure medication, which you conveniently forgot to pack."

"I have to wait a whole hour after I take it to have my coffee, Maria. I don't need it. I'm not stressed," he argues back. They stare at each other like they're about to jump and attack each other for a good few minutes, and everyone in the room just stares. Five years ago, the two were so closeted about their relationship, and now, they're fighting about something like an old married couple right out on public. Well, they practically are an old married couple, but when did they become so open?

But just as the tension builds, it dissolves when Hill starts laughing, and Coulson grins right back at her. If possible, everyone else is more freaked out than before. And then they kiss each other and both laugh, and utensils and coffee mugs fall to the table. Tony is just about to ask what the hell happened between them when Hill walks around the bar and hands Coulson a drawing obviously made by a toddler.

"Louise made this for us before I left. She's says to be safe."

It's a drawing of one big tall blob, one shorter and wider blob, and a then small blob, and a gray scribble. With a crudely written caption in the corner reading "I WILL MISS U, MAMA AND DADDY!"

Natasha almost finds her voice until Hill hands over the picture and they all get a good look at her.

Bruce falls out of his chair and slams on the ground with a loud smack, while the rest stare at Hill like she grew a second head. Except for Thor.

"SON OF COUL! YOU HAVE SEWN YOUR SEED WITH THE HILL MAIDEN! CONGRATULATIONS! MAY YOUR CHILD BE A FINE WARRIOR LIKE YOURSELVES!"

An hour later, Bruce comes to, and Hill and Coulson tell everyone about how they spent their last five years.

The two had decided to rent a small apartment in New York for their off time after the team disassembled. And once SHIELD had things in check, they finally took their honeymoon. When they came back, there was hardly anything of importance for the two of them to do. Together, they made the decision to go on leave, both waiting on standby for anything of importance, but in the meantime, staying off the grid as a normal husband and wife in New York.

And then they had Louise. She was far from planed, but she was perfect. A surprisingly easy pregnancy and delivery. Sure, she had tantrums, played with Agent a little too rough sometimes, drew on the walls with markers, and broke anything she could get her hands on, refused to use utensils, wore princesses dresses to daycare everyday, and screamed herself hoarse if anyone offered her anything pink because she absolutely detested the color, but she was theirs.

Coulson pulls up more pictures of her on his phone, Tony transferring them to holoscreens, and everyone looks in awe at the tiny, glossy curled, little princess two SHIELD agents managed to create in their off time. And then they all stare at Hill's obvious baby bump.

Hill rolls her eyes at them and subconsciously puts a hand on her abdomen. "I'm not due for another five weeks, guys. I'm cleared to be here by SHIELD medical staff and everything."

Clint clears his throat and holds out a hand to Hill's bump. "Do you guys know the gender?"

Hill smiles and pulls Clint's hand the rest of the way to her belly. "It's a boy. We're naming him Chester," Hill replies proudly.

Steve chokes on air in the corner. "I once knew a guy named Chester..." he mumbles when everyone stares at him.

Coulson smiles and wraps an arm around Hill. "Yeah, we're naming him after my great grandfather, General Chester Phillips."

Before Steve has any time to, a siren goes off in the tower. Hill pushes herself up rather quickly for a pregnant woman, though Natasha has to help her get her balance, and starts rattling off orders.

The team heads to the jet on the roof and begins loading up as Fury's voice plays over the coms briefing them all. Everyone boards except Hill, who stands out of the load area, still shouting orders. As they fly off to the rendezvous point, Hill waves goodbye with a smile on her face.

Five weeks later, Thor accidentally breaks the coffee machine in the maternity ward trying to grab coffee for the soon to be father of two. Tony and Bruce have wandered off to look at the newborns, while Clint, Natasha, and Steve sit on the floor and color with a very chatty Louise.

"Daddy says that if we're all good girls, he'll take us to Disney World for my fourth birthday," Louise exclaims while coloring in a picture of an elephant.

"That would be fun," Natasha replies.

"Yeah, so tell the flashlight man to not mess things up. If I'm not hugging Mulan by this time next year, things are going to get bad."

Clint laughs, but Steve and Natasha have a feeling that it's a real threat.


End file.
